TBT: The Hooper

Tech tipsComputer Tricks

Today I’m throwing it back to Hallowe’en 2014 when I witnessed a puzzling event. I’d wanted to write about it back then but felt like a bag of crap so I didn’t.
 
 Anyway. This past October 31st, I didn’t bring a lunch to work and had to go out and grab something to eat. Due to ridiculous allergies, the nearest place with food I can eat is well out of walking distance, so I took my car. As I returned from my lunch excursion and tried to find a place to park, something very out of the ordinary caught my eye.
 
 There, on the south side of the road, across the street from my office building, next to a cruddy vacant lot in the industrial part of town, a woman was hula hooping. Hurr?
 
 I managed to park my car without driving off the road in surprise, and I tried not to make eye contact with the hooper as I got out and made my way into the office. I didn’t want to scare her away as I planned to observe her further from my office window. As I approached my building, the receptionist in one of the other offices was out having a smoke break. ‘What is going on right now I don’t understand’ I said, in a low voice as I approached her. Simultaneously, she yelled ‘WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT LADY DOING’?!? across the parking lot. So much for stealth.
 
 But the hooper was unfazed, and continued what appeared to be an intricate hula hoop routine. Despite her obvious skills, I was still insatiably curious about who she was and why she was hula hooping on the side of the road. My first thought was that perhaps this was some sort of Halloween ruse. Maybe she’s just a hula hooper for the day. Although isn’t it still pretty weird to go hang out on the side of the road in your Halloween costume?
 
 My next thought was that this person must work in one of the many offices on the street, and perhaps she comes out at lunch to get some hula hooping exercise in. That theory went out the window when after a good amount of hooping, the hooper simply stopped and walked over to a nearby car and drove away. Was she a professional hula hooper, trying to generate interest in hula hooping?!?
 
 So, I made a sketch of the scene and asked the Internet to come up with some theories.
 
 


The best theory came from a friend who suggested that perhaps the hooper was simply a Halloween apparition. However, exactly one week later, the hooper returned.
 
 

 This time, her routine was even more impressive as she incorporated texting WHILE hooping. I watched her moves for awhile from my window, while my co-worker (my dad) was useless at providing new theories.
 
 


Sadly, November 6, 2014 was the second, and final, sighting of the hooper. I watch for her every day, hoping she’ll return with her smooth hip moves and multitasking abilities. I still have so many questions. Who was the hooper? Will she ever be back? Does she hoop around other parts of town? Why did she choose to hoop where she did? I guess I’ll never know.
 
 Fare thee well, hooper.
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One Response to TBT: The Hooper

  1. God says:

    Listen to your father.

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